Bureaucracy - 1: Me - 0

Now that I've finally been granted a Residence Visa I can't drive on my international licence. The law here says that I must have a UAE licence. Both NZ and Australian licences can simply be transferred, no need to do a driving test. Anyway off I go out to the Dubai RTA at Al Basha with my completed application form, 4 passport photos, letter from my employer, copy of my employment contract, passport and driver's licence. First I have to go to a special area to have my application form retyped in Arabic. I had to wait in a queue but the translators (all Emirati guys) didn't want me sitting alone on a bench with all the 'bachelors' so they found me a chair and put it behind the reception counter. I then sat behind the counter with the local guys while the bachelors glared at me from the wooden bench. Unfortunately it was at this point that the translator told me that I couldn't get a local licence because my passport (NZ) and drivers licence (NSW) are from different countries. "Sorry Madame, that is the law, but you can sit with us for as long as you like...." He then told me I would need at least 20-40 driving lessons before I would be given an appointment to sit for a UAE licence. Oh, you can imagine how calmly I took that little piece of information! Anyway to get the UAE licence my choices are:

1. Go back to NZ and resit my licence. When I first got my drivers licence Henderson didn't even have traffic lights and knowing that the speed limit over railway tracks was 15mph was important. Anyone who's ever hit the tracks at the end of Railside Ave in the old days will know why..........
2. Take 20-40 driving lessons here (What will I learn? How to drive on the hard shoulder? How to cut people off? How to make left turns out of the right hand lane?) and then sit for the driving test; or
3. Take Australian citizenship then apply for an Aus passport so my passport and licence are both from the same country which, apparently, makes me a far better driver.

So the most logical thing is to take the Aus citizenship. I want to be able to vote there and I regard Australia as my home and the Sydney Swans as my team. I can have dual citizenship so I don't have to give up my NZ citizenship, that just ain't happening any time. So at the moment I can't legally drive here not even on an international licence. This drives me totally nuts. I drool at the passing parade of local SS's and think "One day you shall by mine, my pretty". Colin just rolls his eyes and shudders.